3 Reasons Why I’m Not Sharing my Child on Social Media
My sweet mini-muffin is creeping up on 9 months old…Can you believe it? I definitely can’t.
One of the most-asked questions I get from my online community about him is: “Will you ever show us your little one’s face?”
The answer? No.
Like, a hard no.
And even though No is a full sentence, and aside from the plain fact that we simply do not want to, we actually have three major reasons why we made this decision.
You’d be surprised how many DM’s I’ve gotten since giving birth in November to just “send one pic”. And no, I am not taking about friends or family, but rather complete strangers on social media that I have never met.🤪 (Umm sure, user28490304 I’ll send YOU -of all people- a photo of my baby…???)
During my pregnancy, we chatted about this topic & came to the conclusion that we did not want to post our little one’s face online.
Babies are adorable, so I get it— I’d be curious too!
But, it’s been absolutely fascinating to notice how people react when a boundary that is out of the norm, is created and upheld.
Every family has their own preferences, of course! I really believe to each their own, if feels right for them.
As for me, I’ve written a blog about MY decision to answer this FAQ I receive.
3 Reasons I’m Not Sharing my Child on Social Media
1. Child’s privacy and right to decide
It was important for us to consider the fact that, even though he is too small to express his own opinion on this, he has the right to choose what his relationship with the internet will be, later in life, when the time comes. While I want nothing more than to share how adorable our little guy is, we acknowledged that the decision to share him would only consider US and OUR choice, and not be inclusive for HIS voice or vision. Once you post something on the internet, it doesn’t vanish just because you’ve deleted it due to a change of heart….. So, with complete ferocity, we decided his privacy was ours to protect.
2. Unknown online audience
While social media is amazing for connecting us with distant friends and family, it goes without saying that online trolls, bullies, and dangerous predators are ever-present and lurking…Silently, too, without interaction. I choose to share my thoughts and experiences about motherhood. But, from the very beginning during pregnancy, I knew I would never contribute complete photos of my child online, or, any type of “sharenting” (Sharenting is the practice of parents publicizing sensitive content about their children on internet platforms). Not only do I not care for unsolicited parenting advice from strangers, but, not one Like or one Follow is worth this risk of danger, in my opinion. My friends and family know that any photos of our baby are not to to be shared digitally in any way, and it keeps us as safe as possible. Even small tidbits in photos can reveal so much about your home, location, time of day, routines, and more, that can dangerously compromise your family. You never know who is screen-shotting a photo of ANYthing you post, which is VERY common (think about the number of times you save a photo that somebody else posted…Or share it with other people and privately discuss it…. Even if innocent, it’s way more common than we realize).
I won’t even expand on the darkest realms of the topic of strangers seeing child-specific content; it makes me sick to consider that. But, we HAVE to talk about this because these ugly truths are a MASSIVE reason why online sharing is a hard no for us.
3. Potential future opportunity restrictions
Future opportunities and employment can be restricted by curating an online presence of the entire existence of a child. My fiancé and I acknowledge that, while innocent now, photos or content will literally only take milliseconds from a Google search for his employer to pull up, YEARS from now, about YEARS of his life if we share it online.
Fact-checking a resume, searching for incriminating content, or even all of that digitized information getting scooped up and used in machine-learning (or other ways we still cannot even imagine yet) are all important to consider…. And we simply do not like the idea of it.
The point is, we don’t even know WHAT some negative points might be from a future standpoint — we aren’t there yet, after all!
But, we have to stop to ask these thought-provoking questions about the future impacts, NOW, so that the non-actions taken can outweigh an instant-gratification actions to make a “funny” Reel or TikTok with our baby just to appease complete strangers on the internet.
Did you have this discussion about the internet and family and how/if you’d share your child online?
I recognize there are different circumstances and perspectives everywhere. Every parents' decisions on their child's experience with the online world is unique and personal, and no two people think or feel the same exact way.
What I’m sharing here is my own personal decision and I'm voicing that in response to the number one question I get asked. I hope that it’ll not only answer the question, but, help create a dialogue around this important topic.
I am honouring what has felt right for me and our family and ✨I’m comfortable with others being uncomfortable with me & my decisions if it means I stayed true to myself. ✨
Stay safe and be well,
Amanda